With today's fast-paced lifestyle, where almost every minute is scheduled, many people simply don't have time for love. Moreover, most are used to getting everything as quickly as possible: food delivery in half an hour, the information they need in a couple of minutes, a response via messaging in seconds. And the classic courtship, where one gradually gets to know the other person, is, for many, an unattainable luxury. That's why many people start to think that romanticism in the modern world has simply disappeared under the pressure of deadlines. But, in reality, it has only transformed. Below, we explain why speed in relationships isn't always a bad thing.
Unhurried Dating vs. Instant Decision Culture
At first glance, these two phenomena may seem contradictory. However, they not only coexist but also complement each other. This is because the modern dating format often combines both scenarios. The first is based on patience and caution, while the second is based on impulse.
When meeting online, people try not to rush. Many communicate online for a long time before deciding to meet. The reason is simple: nowadays, time and emotional resources are highly valued. Few people want to invest in someone without knowing if the relationship has a future. Therefore, slow dating isn't about indecision, but rather about the desire to avoid unpleasant experiences.
At the same time, the culture of instant decisions, which has emerged in the digital age, sets its own rules. In dating apps, first impressions are often formed in just a few seconds. And often, a user only needs a photo or a couple of lines in a profile to make an instant decision: swipe right or left.
Overall, this contradictory "combination" has become a response to the realities of our time. Due to the abundance of options, people are forced to act faster when choosing a potential partner. Otherwise, the search process can become endless. At the same time, many people move very slowly towards a real-life meeting, because when dating begins easily and ends just as easily, many develop a desire to protect themselves.
Why 'Prolonged Warm-Up' No Longer Works
It's important to understand that excessively prolonged online communication often becomes a trap. And here's why:
- Idealisation of the partner: When we chat for weeks, we inevitably start attributing the character traits or physical appearance we would like to see in the person we are chatting with. Especially if there is a lot of communication but no visual contact. In that case, the gaps in information are filled with fantasies and expectations. As a result, when the time finally comes to meet in person, we often end up disappointed. Because in front of us is a real person who is far from the ideal image we have created in our heads after months of messaging.
- Loss of interest: When conversation topics run dry and true closeness isn't developed, communication gradually fades away. Even strong attraction weakens when there's no interaction beyond messages. Therefore, if there is mutual interest, it must be backed up with actions, not endless messages.
- The illusion of closeness: Prolonged online communication often creates the feeling that a bond has already been formed. But closeness in messages and in real life is not the same. You can spend hours discussing personal topics and still feel completely differently about that communication. For example, for one person, it may simply be a way to vent, while the other may indulge in the illusion that they have found their partner.
Moreover, an excessively prolonged "warm-up" makes communication an endless preparation for a relationship. Often, people spend months planning to take the next step but never actually do it. Doubts arise, and there is fear of ruining what already exists. But the longer the "warm-up" lasts, the greater the chances that the relationship will end before it even begins.
The New Norm: Seeing and Understanding in 5 Minutes
That's why the strategy of "getting to the point quickly" works much better today than a situation that drags on. Moreover, many people don't want to spend weeks exchanging messages that never lead to anything more. And a situation that progresses at a good pace doesn't have to imply superficiality or a lack of willingness to get to know someone better. On the contrary, people are driven by the desire to distinguish reality from the illusions that easily arise in messages.
Today, there are online dating formats that favour a quicker connection. For example, video chats. In them, you can communicate with a person almost as if in real life, without leaving your comfort zone. The main advantage of this format is the live interaction. When you meet someone in a video chat, you don't have to wonder if that person looks like the photos they've posted. Communication happens in real-time, and you see your interlocutor without filters or masks. Plus, you can ensure that the new person isn't pretending to be someone else.
The Instant Verification Method: A Video Call
Most importantly, during a video call, you can immediately realise whether you want to keep talking to that person. If, after five minutes of talking via video, you don't feel like getting to know them better, it's unlikely that those feelings will arise after an hour or a week. Therefore, video chat dating is also a way to stop wasting time communicating with people out of mere courtesy. If you don't like your interlocutor, you just have to hit the "Next" button and, in seconds, start getting to know another person without feeling guilty.
By the way, many people prefer to have a video call before meeting in person. It's a great way to maintain safety and ensure you don't waste time. Even a brief video call can provide much more information than hours of messaging. That's why so many couples today meet on platforms like videollamadas.chat. There are no fake accounts here, as all girls must go through a verification process. This allows for free video calls with women from other countries safely. You can be sure that you are communicating with real people, not bots or scammers.
Speed Doesn't End Feelings, It Filters Them
Quick dating isn't as bad as it's often thought. In fact, by quickly overcoming stages of uncertainty and doubt, we can find the "right" person much sooner. Romance has certainly not disappeared. It has simply become more dynamic and, more importantly, more sincere.
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